In Honor

In honor of a good man, a tree was dedicated in Ruston last spring. Former mayor Phil Parker's contributions were memorialized with the dedication of this tree, bought with funds he donated to the town just before his death. You can read more about the dedication here... Town maintenance men finalized the mounting of the plaque into the marble base this week, completing this space where we can now sit and reflect on those who, like Phil, gave so much to our town.

I was privileged to speak at the dedication ceremony. I thought it would be fitting to share those words now that the memorial is complete:

I wish there was something I could point to in Ruston and say “that’s Phil’s legacy”, but there isn’t any such monument that captures his gift to this town. After almost two decades of selfless service, I’m only left with fleeting memories of the issues he championed. He worked alongside Charlene (Hagen) to upgrade Rust Playfield. He led the effort to install a Big Toy there for his kids and others to enjoy.

He was content to see Ruston remain a bedroom community to the greater Tacoma area. I remember when he fought to purchase the Garrison home across Winnifred Street and build an expanded town hall complex. He served on the fire department; he chaired numerous committees and represented Ruston well to the outside world on important issues like negotiating for redevelopment of the former Asarco site. He was always in the middle of any community event, giving his time and energy to make us better.

 Phil was a quiet man who listened first before giving his opinion. He was fair and willing to change his position if you presented enough evidence to convince him. He was a bulldog on the issues that were important to him. In that he presented a gentle strength – he’d work as long and as hard as it took to complete the task.

 I think one of the reasons we don’t have something concrete to point to as Phil’s legacy is because he wasn’t that kind of man. He would rather work behind the scenes, bringing people together, quietly negotiating an agreement. He recognized and encouraged talent in those around him and easily passed the baton to others if that accomplished the goal.

Even though we don’t have some “glory piece” we can attribute to Phil’s time in leadership here in Ruston, I do know his efforts are a big part of why Ruston still exists today. He worked hard to sustain the town through years of financial struggle while the outside world sat back and waited for us to disappear. Somehow that’s fitting… I think he would want it that way… no big monument with his name in lights… but survival, sustained by hard work and love is his legacy to Ruston. He left us a foundation for a future that we can build on now.

But in many ways this tree will serve as that monument for Phil’s contributions to Ruston. He didn’t build it with his own hands, but it’s a place that reflects the man – quiet, beautiful, strong, a place to pause and reflect on the important things.

In the end, it’s not Phil’s legacy to Ruston that matters. His legacy to world, as it is for any of us, is his children. He loved you Courtney, Kim and Aaron… Each breath you take is in his honor, you carry his legacy of love to a new generation. You can bring his grandchildren to this place now and reflect on his gifts to both Ruston and to you, his family.

As I’ve thought about Phil’s many contributions to my life, I’m reminded that even his death taught me much. One of the biggest lessons I carry from Phil’s life is realizing how important it is to tell each other often how much we love each other – not to sweat the little things – don’t put off till tomorrow mentioning the good we see in each other.

I still miss my friend with the bushy beard, sitting by the window at the little store with his suspenders, florescent pink socks and Birkenstocks. I wish he was here to watch this tree grow, to sit with us and dream big dreams for this town. So Phil, we’ll just have to dream for you. I pray you are at peace now. Know that your town remembers and thanks you today for all your gifts to us.